Me: walk into Subway
Manager lady: NO, WE DON'T HAVE IT. NOPE. WE'RE ALL OUT.
Me: [blank stare] uhhh....ha ha....yeah...
Manager lady: HAHAHAHA, WHAT CAN WE GET YA.
Me: yeah do you have the veggie max sub here?
Manager lady: SURE DO. PUT THE GREEN PEPPERS AND OLIVES ON IT THOUGH, IT'S THE ONLY WAY TO EAT THAT SUB.
Me: Um, I'm ok thanks...
Manager lady: YOU WANT TO TOAST THIS ONE TOO, PERSONAL SUGGESTION, IT MAKES IT TASTE BETTER.
Me: ok....I'll have it toasted...
Then the poor 16 year-old in between the big manager lady and the sandwich counter started making my sandwich. She had a look in her eyes that screamed "help me she's going to put me back in the closet after I'm done making your sandwich." so my sandwich is done, I go to the register:
16 year-old to Manager lady: ummmm...the credit card machine is still down.
Manager lady to 16 year-old: [in an attempted whisper tone that I can clearly hear] WATCH THIS....
Manager lady to 16 year-old: GIVE HIM THE SANDWICH. JUST GIVE IT TO HIM!
[16 year-old hesitates as her mind subconsciously shuffles through her ethical values and tries to makes sense of why she is giving away free food from a restaurant that clearly charges people for food, and which could have made arrangements to only take cash instead of just giving away food. But she slowly slides the sandwich my way anyway.]
Manager lady to me: LUNCH IS ON ME TODAY, NO CHARGE.
Me: ....boy that's great, thanks so much.
Manager lady: YOU ARE WELCOME. [looks at me with a creepy stare because she knows that she just pulled off the coolest manager move she could ever make, and is waiting for my mind to explode because of the slyness and craftiness of her moves.]
4 comments:
Are you sure she hasn't had her eye on you every time you have come in? Kind of weird if you ask me, but thanks for the laugh.
woof that would be scary I wouldn't be surprised if she did! either way I think I'll go to the other subway next time!
Dude... Creepy Subway Manager Lady jonesin on you is TOTALLY worth it for a free sandwich. Maybe next time you go in you can see if they also ship free sandwiches down to Vegas. Let her know I'm VERY interested if she does.
ROFLMBO that was great! You should've slipped her a fake number lol
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